Thursday, 16 August 2012

Inertia

I am going through a period of inertia.  I am apathetic to what is going on around me.  Garden structures are collapsing, the dead tomato plants in the greenhouse need clearing away, the house needs a thorough clean and tidy and yet although aware of all these tasks to be completed I seem not to care.

Yesterday I did my volunteering session up at the vineyard.  We had many failed crops this year and the crops that are doing well we have found difficult to manage.  'Bud rubbing' should have been completed back in May but we are so behind that we are 'bud rubbing' still which now means pruning 3 foot long branches as opposed to rubbing off tiny little shoots.  My voluntary work has lost some of its appeal.  I can't quite figure out why.  I don't think it has changed much but maybe I have?  Maybe I am just sick and tired of what I see as a string of failures. 

I willed myself out of the inertia for a brief spell yesterday when I made some blackberry jelly.  2lbs of blackberries and 1lb of sugar yielded just one jar.  It had better taste good!!!

As I sit and type this I can hear someone using a chainsaw in a garden at the back of the house, at the front of the house council workers are using a pneumatic drill.  Constant noise surrounds me and I just want some peace and quiet.  I think I will go for a long walk later.  I need time to think without the distractions.  I need some clarity of thought.  I will return with my 'happy hat' and leave the sad mask behind.

7 comments:

KC'sCourt! said...

You and me both - I just cannot get motivated with anything! No wonder you cannot get motivated with all that noise around you, think I'll join you on the long walk! Virtually speaking!
After your post about blackberries I went and had a look at mine - Nothing! a very bad year for me!
Julie xxxxxx

greenrabbitdesigns said...

I think a good long brisk walk is just what you need Simone to blow away those cobwebs!!
Fresh air and exercise are both very good for lifting the spirits.
Even doing some of those boring tasks is uplifting too, make a list (I love lists) and tick them off as you do them, very satisfying!
Put some music on, louder than the saw and drill.
And now having given you advice I'm going to take some of my own and take the duster for a walk around the house and wash the kitchen floor (and then tick it off the list)!!
V xxxxx

marigold jam said...

Sorry to hear that you sound so down just now - have you been ill recently or anything? Maybe a tonic of some kind (Floradix I usually find good) would help you get back your joie de vivre. As greenrabbit says a walk is always good for helping to get things in perspective and being able to tick some things of a list (as long as the list is not too long and thus depressing) helps too. It's been a funny old summer this year and we have just pulled up the tomato plants as they are blighted! Everything is out of kilter in the plant world so maybe you are suffering from the same (not tomato blight I don't mean!) If it would help to have a chat or to be in e-mail contact to have a talk that way do let me know as I've been there I know how it feels but it does pass.

Rosie said...

I find loud noises aggravate me more than they ever used to. I can't listen to music at the moment as it just irritates. When I felt sad or un-motivated I would always play Jimi Hendrix or Bach very loudly but I can't do that anymore. I think quite a few of us in varying degrees are suffering from SAD because of the weird weather we've had for most of this year. You could do with a few days away somehwere quiet and peaceful but if that isn't possible a lovely, long walk does help to lift the spirits. Take carexx

wherethejourneytakesme said...

Sorry to hear you are feeling sad - I hope it passes soon. It has been a funny old year so far with the weather being rather unpredictable and then a string of wonderful celebrations which now seem as 'over' as the summer and everything feels a bit flat in some ways - like after Christmas. I have felt quite behind all year and both my gardens seem a bit of a mess, the pots of flowers never really took off, but maybe we will have an Indian summer in September and October to make up for the lack of sunshine earlier. Take care of yourself and maybe a few good peaceful walks will help cheer you up.

sharon said...

Each growing season we have such high hopes for the garden, the weather, our creative output. We feel the "failures" heavy on our hearts. They loom so large their shadows block the light of the "successes."
I look back on your postings of the summer and I see magical photography, a growing Etsy shop, love lavished on animals and blogging friends. A moon garden that inspires. The outpouring of love that became a necklace.
I see a kindred spirit striving to keep beauty alive in what often feels like an ugly world.
I'm here to remind you that you are loved and thought about with much esteem. Hold onto this thought as Mother Nature begins the gradual sliding into the fairer season of autumn.

Lyn said...

it has been a rubbish year for fruit, hardly any damsons so very little jam will be made and i can count the number of apples we have on our tree on one hand!
I have no craft mojo and as the summer holiday slips away i am feeling guilty.
i love the comment from sharon above.
keep strong
xxx